20 tipos de comentadores de listas de melhores

O NPR publicou esta semana uma lista hilária: The 20 Unhappiest People You Meet In The Comments Sections Of Year-End Lists, (numa tradução literal: «As 20 pessoas mais infelizes que você encontra nos comentários de listas de final de ano») com os típicos ilustres anônimos que infestam os blogues pelo mundo afora. Publico aqui os dez primeiros mas a lista completa você encontra aqui.

1. The Poisoned. "The fact that you included Adele on this list of 100 things you like makes it a total joke."
2. The Really Pretty Sure Person, Who Is Really Pretty Sure. "I've never seen Game Of Thrones, but I'm really pretty sure it's not as good as Boardwalk Empire."
3. The Person Who Is Exactly Right. "It really seems like this list of things you thought were good is just your opinion."
4. The Surprisingly Lucid Narcoleptic. "ZZZZZZZZZ" is the classic. "SNORE" and "YAWN" are acceptable variants.
5. The Mother Of Tim "Freckles" Matterley. "There is a musician in Ann Arbor named Tim Matterley who is better than all these songs! You would like his music. He has a web site at FrecklesMatterley.com, and you can get his songs free on your computer! Please check out Tim Matterley, who does not have a big record contract YET but is very very good!!!!" Two comments later, she will often come back. "Also, Tim Matterley is in this YouTube video where he plays 'Imagine' at a children hospital. I am just one fan but I think he is great and he will go far!!!"
6. The Read A Book Guy. "Not one of these movies is as good as reading a book." On a list of books, by the way, he will say none of the books is as good as books used to be. He also hates Kindles, which he may or may not mention.
7. The Self-Punisher. "I always hate your tastes, so I knew this would be a miserable and useless list before I decided to click on it and read the whole thing, and now I know I was right."
8. The Unwitting Outlier. "Has anyone really cared about George Clooney since ER?"
9. The Person With The Imperfect Grasp Of Obscurity."These are all completely obscure picks nobody has ever heard of. The Girl With A Dragon Tattoo sounds like a Dr. Seuss book."
10. Harry The Hipster-Hater, Who Really, Really Hates Hipsters. "This is all hipster music. I guess it's okay for hipsters, but I'm not enough of a hipster to like hipster picks like this. Too bad I'm not hipster enough. Maybe I'd like it better if I were more of a hipster." [His username: "notahipstersorry."]

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